I do feel like Helen is wanting us all to act like Saints. I kinda agreed with her mom, like I am sorry, but I do. It's in my heart. It's something deep. Maybe she unconsciously criticizes me. 

I am not sure how to feel about her sometimes. Her own mother called her "a high class bitch." 

I would prefer that to what I'm getting. I get treated like I'm dirty, a peasant, gross, -- I have an infected tooth that broke while I was eating Marco's Pizza, and it hurts like a bitch. The lymph nodes are very swollen. Toothache. I already slept. Got a window unit a/c. People are going to be here to fix it tomorrow. 

If she's so bad for me, why does vibin' with her feel so good?

I feel like something "owns" me. I don't feel in my body, or a part of this reality, or anything.

What gives? My stuff always gets messed up. "High class bitch" 

Ugh, meds making me hungry. I can't stand this. I want the world to end. I'm fucking miserable.