Well I posted on Facebook about my dissociative identity disorder. I don’t know what caused it. I don’t know if I wanna know. Anyway. I think that it’s best to not look at that memory.
Alastair wants to come out but that can be bad. He used to be a pimp. He was incarcerated at one time in the mental hospital. It was against his will which differs from jackal. He reminds me of the jackal from 13 ghosts I am not sure if they’re the same person but it really seems that way. Being that I am Set the Egyptian god I think it’s possible but I’m not sure.
I have a male merman personality that likes to sing and listen to music. The female counterpart seems to use music and sound to attract a partner. Mermaids do not necessarily like merman. He is aggressive and hostile and unpredictable yet he likes to sing. The other voices voices that I hear which is MK ultra and aliens enjoy the singing as They can hear my thoughts. I think that I am very fubared. I am diagnosed schizoaffective in which is schizophrenia and bipolar together. As well as ADHD and general anxiety disorder. Now being 29 I realize that I have dissociative identity disorder or multiple personalities disorder.
One of my personality is St. Germain. He is a vampire. And I will wake up and we have to feed him vampire oriented food. A good blood substitute is yogurt. Chocolate also works. And fruit. I have a clown personality named what the fuck. What the fuck is also a vampire. Goddess nemesis is one of the only people that knows how to take care of him. People thought he was strange but I did not realize he was a vampire.
A voice told me that they were killing clowns for fun. I naturally would be very concerned. MK ultra handlers told me that I was Joker. I was in the real guy Joker. They call me Jerome and it insinuates Alien contact and I found out that I am a moth man. Extra terrestrial. And that I am at undercover men in black. Which I am working as a grey agent.
Being transgender is very difficult for me. I really don’t like it at all. Dysmorphia is terrible. I often feel bad about myself and my body because it’s not what’s on the inside. As children we are told it’s what’s on the inside that counts. Now this world seems very superficial and I find that I often don’t fit in and I don’t belong. It’s a generation that teaches itself not to care when we should have a lot of compassion for one another and that’s coming from a vampire. I encounter lots of opposition and disagreement with others. Being a vampire I like to stick to myself. I like those that engage in my writing however. I often write comments that are very long on Facebook. MKultra tells me that I have autism but I don’t know if I believe them. Definitely don’t want to be autistic. But it wouldn’t be the end of the world and some very smart people artistic even scientists.
I feel that it could be due to my birthday being on the fourth of the month. It is rigid. I have goals and I try to get them achieved but not to my benefit I am often far too aggressive. My mercury is in Aries. Life has been unkind to me in general I suffered for 30 years it seems. My father died five weeks into my life. My mother was left with two children. We were on our own. Was suffering didn’t and Life has been unkind to me in general. I suffered for 30 years it seems. My father died five weeks into my life. My mother was left with two children. We were on our own. The suffering didn’t end there.
Feel like Lestat. Even though technically probably more like Marius. Telling about my life my history my thoughts my experiences. I hope not to encounter any vampire hunters or werewolves. But I don’t know not sure. Not that I’m doing anything bad. Drinking blood is a sin. I own a book that teaches vampires they don’t have to drink blood. But I feel like I was frenzying.
I feel like I was thought to be a worthless human by MK alter. They just said not true. They try to make me feel embarrassed of the times that I called 911. I do not know what was happening. There were FBI and CIA in my room projecting somehow. I realize that I am famous in one section of my mind. But it isn’t quite thinking in yet.
Marilyn Manson is on. Enki is said to be Set’s dad. Marilyn Manson is a clone of him. So Marilyn Manson is pretty much my dad right? Ha ha. Both laughed at my logic. But I find it plausible.
Anyways. Let us get back to the multiple personality disorder. I tried to get Narcissus to come out. We need to clean the house before the landlord comes in. We’re also not supposed to be smoking in here. But we do anyway. Life is great when we quit smoking. But I started again. After the stress of being incarcerated. It was Saturn. He was out. Narcissists had fought Zeus. And Saturn came out in jail. It was the cops that beat us up. Not another inmate. They had me on suicide watch. It was terrible there. They gave me a drug called Librium. It help with my memory loss actually. It’s to help wean you off of substances. I don’t think I’m autistic. I think I’m trying to go for some type of goal. And I keep getting stopped or prevented.
And the mercury in aries isn’t helping. I am something that people try to breed they try to create people like me. I am a Fae. And a demon. A god. And orc. I do not desire children so no thanks. Well anyway with Narcissus I tried to get him to clean the house. And he got upset. And didn’t wanna do it. He’s a hunter so it could be a good deal. Once he got started he did not want to stop cleaning. It was pretty humorous. At the grocery store, an unknown male alter came out. It was the moth man. Or a demon. They’re me. I’m not possessed. I felt like a very tired man in black. I take seven different medications. My alters are like a revolving door right now. I can’t control who comes out sometimes. I can try. But I’m not sure if it’ll work.
